Samara was unsettled by the news. She hoped until the very end that she would find some luck somewhere, or, it is wiser to say, that good luck would find her. Not this time though.
She took a few moments to take some deep breaths and calm down. Looking into the bathroom mirror while washing her hands she encouraged herself to go out there, with her head held high and not show the turmoil going inside her.
With a final inspiration she pushed the door and went to sit back at the table right in front of Stefan. He was beaming of course and why wouldn’t he? He got the promotion for the work SHE did! He got the cake and the cherry on top while she did the long hours, ditched her boyfriend, family and friends and stopped eating properly. He did not even mention her in his thanks speech.
The most raging part was that he thought he got away with it, and that she was just a naïve small town girl who would be a pushover for ever. Well, not today! At least she felt like that in the moment, but she definitely knew that once she would go back home that evening, she will once again blame herself for being spineless and not having enough courage to say stop and scream “Noooo!”. She hated herself for being like that every single day.
“-So Stefan, now that you can take over the team, do you have a strategy for the next months ? With the StarLine project, you will be overwhelmed and you need to have the team to back you up.” the financial auditor, Mike, was talking to Stefan.
“-Ow, I am not worried about that. I have a team that supports me and that will always give 200% to succeed.
Look at Sinara, she even refused to go to her boyfriend’s 31st birthday to finish the draft for the Janson project. I am not doubting her loyalty for what will be next.” he blinked at Samara in a charming way.
In that moment Samara disintegrated in a million pieces. Time stopped and they were floating around what used to be her body and she could not do anything to stop it. She had no more rage inside her, just infinite emptiness.
“-I quit” she said waking up from her reverie. All the pieces came back together stronger that she ever thought.
She did not even wait for anyone’s response, she sat up and left the table. At the checkout she said to the concierge “Lunch will be covered by those misters at the table. They also asked me to tell you that they would need to get the best champagne you have, they are celebrating a big promotion. “
“What champagne would they want? “
“I do not think they have a preference, but more expensive it is the better they will appreciate it. I mean they are financial advisors, they know value only in money, if you know what I mean” she said with a chuckle and the concierge smiled knowingly.
“Have a nice day, Miss!”
Samara smiled and thanked the young man and got out in the street.
She could finally breath freely.
And…. then panic took over her. She just quit her job that she hated, yes!, but also the pay check that covered her rental and food and expenses and the occasional binge drinking that was her “therapy” of sorts.
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!” she screamed at the top of her lungs, startling about fifteen persons and a few dogs and pigeons around her. But she did not care at all. After the anxiety wave though, a calm power took over her and she felt again, liberated.
She put a smile on her face and the middle finger for the greasy guy looking at her like she was the piece of shit he stepped on and went in the direction of the subway.
So what about that job? Was it all she wished for? She knew if was the horror of each passing day for her and it did not bring her anything of value. She will find another way, she would look up ways to sell services as a freelance, she will start an Etsy business, she will sell flowers in the streets, she will learn piano and do concerts for music aficionados… She’ll go clean houses if needed, it did not matter at all.
The thing is that she did understand that the value of a so called “career” when it destroys the essence of you was less than zero and society made her think that without it, she would be a loser. But for the first time she understood that it is the other way around: running after titles and promotions while draining all your energy and time on things you do not like is making you the worst of losers, not the other way around.
To win at life, you had to be yourself and become great at it. And Samara wanted to be the greatest. At that moment, life was good!
